Archive for February, 2009

Gran Torino: The Movie

Monday, February 9th, 2009

Something is happening out there. It’s obvious that with the increasing envir­on­mental pressures facing the planet – and the regulatory regimes being put in place the world over to attempt to curtail the internal combustion engine’s contri­bution to climate change – that the meaning of the motor car is bound to change in people’s minds. But the rate of that change is what is truly astounding. While it is generally accepted by even the most rev-​​headed amongst us that unres­tricted emissions and V8s for everyone would mean a dirty, screwed up envir­onment for our children’s children, and that something must ultimately be done about it, the aesthetic of the powerful vehicle remains deeply rooted and celeb­rated. In fact, it seems that the more it becomes overly expensive, imprac­tical and (perhaps) unethical to use a partic­ulate spewing behemoth as your daily ride, the more these machines become trans­muted to the realms of the icon. The image of these icons however, in these twisted times, warps and shudders like a flame in the wind. In America muscle cars have always repres­ented a particular kind of youthful irrespons­ib­ility. Bursting with unashamed Detroit brawn, they were the sort of vehicles that helped sustain America’s idea of itself during the oil crises of the early seventies. But in Gran Torino, the latest box office hit from Clint Eastwood, the fastbacked speedster (and star of seventies cop series Starsky and Hutch) represents a simpler world, one that, we are led to presume, we should hanker after and at the same time be slightly ashamed of. Clint’s character is a Korean war veteran and an embittered ex auto worker. He keeps his green 1972 Gran Torino Sport (which he helped bring into the world) pristine and protected behind the doors of his garage, away from the streets of a neigh­bourhood wracked by what he perceives as untimely change and ethnic discord. When members of a local gang steals the car, all hell is unleashed. But what looks at first glimpse like Eastwood redis­cov­ering his anachron­istic Dirty Harry–ness turns out to be a sensitive, thought-​​provoking medit­ation on prejudice, change and the place of the motorcar in the American psyche. With workers in the Auto industry the world over being forced to look at their future more urgently than ever, the release is a timely piece of mind food with real relevance if you care about your cars.

The Evil Genius of ATVs

Friday, February 6th, 2009

The passion for motor vehicles starts early. Little kids love to push toy vehicles around, projecting their dreams through their fingertips. Kids’ TV hammers that passion home. Forty years ago this was done by shows like Captain Scarlet and The Thunderbirds. Now the role is perfomed by Roary The Racing Car and Lightning McQueen. You could read this as a seedy conspiracy on behalf of the enter­tainment industry and the military-​​industrial complex to snare young minds and souls into a lifetime of drudgery and enslavement to the wage – or you could read this as meaning that motor vehicles tweak something essential in our deep-​​lying psyche. I reckon there’s something in both views. There are few auto enthu­siasts who can’t especially dig the thought of being able to move out across the landscape at absolute will – partic­u­larly in the sort of snowbound condi­tions that we have been burdened by of late. Go to the alpine areas of the planet and you can see how humans have prepared to boldly go where no vehicle has gone before. Securing snowbound oilfields in Siberia may not be at the top of the agenda these days – it’s mostly about mining the lucrative potential for leisure activ­ities. The Pisten Bully is the commercial cream of the snow-​​creeping crop, and lays down untold horsepower and manoeuv­rab­ility whilst applying minimal ground pressure. These babies are able to not only move across the most extreme terrain to maintain power and leisure infra­structure, but to sculpt that terrain into snowparks, half-​​pipes and all manner of fun things. Pistenbully has cornered the market in Europe with incredibly simple operating systems combined with mind bending engin­eering. Nodwell, on the other hand, was an early US manufac­turer of snow mobile vehicles (like the one pictured above) that simply made supercool objects straight outta Mad Max. But for pure hammer-​​and-​​spanner, evil genius panache Russian manufac­turer ZiL take the cake. Their spookily named, terri­fying looking ‘29061’ model from the Soviet mid-​​seventies was driven by corkscrews and could crush everything in its path. Perfect for the contem­porary oligarch looking into salt mine investment oppor­tun­ities. We doubt the manufac­turers and designers were over bothered about emissions regula­tions. MWAHHAHHAAHHHAAAAA!

If you fancy one of these I’m sure Adrian Flux will give it a go insuring it, call 0800 089 0050.

The Honda Super Cub

Thursday, February 5th, 2009

Of all the vehicles in all the nations in all the continents of the entire world, there is none as ubiquitous as the Honda Super Cub. Better known in the UK as the C-​​series (C50, C70 and C90) and here beloved most of all by training London cabbies and pizza delivery boys, this little step through is officially the best selling vehicle in history. It is estimated that the Honda Corporation has old over 60 Million units of the iconic little bike, which celeb­rated its 50th birthday in 2008. But not only has the Super Cub been seen as a cipher for utilit­arian transport for over half a century, it has inspired some of the most fervent dedic­ation known to man. Little wonder, because the friendly, colour-​​coded body designed by Johzaburo Kimura is an all-​​time classic, and has encap­su­lated the approachable brand values of Honda since the very beginning. Honda took up the challenge of providing a small, high-​​performance, low-​​cost bike that could be used throughout the world, by mounting a 4-​​stroke 50cc engine on a chassis that was easy to both ride and had a trans­mission system that was easy for urbanites from sixteen to seventy to operate. The Super Cub was the first truly reliable two-​​wheeled run-​​around at a time when the majority of people all over the world were still recov­ering from the economic ravages of the Second World War. Sales easily outstripped European-​​made scooters made by Vespa and Lambretta. Modish scooters might have been cool, but up until very recently they were notori­ously unreliable. But though in the UK the Super Cub has never been hip, in other parts of the world they have achieved real cult status, partic­u­larly amongst the yoof. The Beach Boys, for example gave wings to the cult of the Super Cub in California with their ‘Little Honda’ (Spot the Ferrari 250 Lusso, the E-​​Type and the ‘Vette in the video) that only narrowly escaped being released as a single in 1965. And the web is littered with very personal homage to the machine. The love-​​letter to the design is encap­su­lated beauti­fully in the video below, complete with soul-​​stirring tune by Burt Bacharach. With the recent explosion in popularity of all sorts of newly designed scooters, mini bikes and mopeds, the Supercub’s retro design, combined with its tried-​​and-​​tested bombproof construction, is still one of the world’s favourites.

English Blood, Finnish Soul

Wednesday, February 4th, 2009

It was a Saturday morning. Dickie Davies was leaning forward, staring intensely at the camera, bedecked in silver flash hair do and decked out in a sports coat of turquoise polyester. You could almost smell the Old Spice on him. The ‘tached anchorman was about to introduce us to a new sensation in the world of motor sport. The steroid-​​ridden, turbocharged, whining, spitting monstros­ities that were Group B rally cars had stepped onto the world stage and were causing a sensation. The sensation was to be deadly, irresponsible and short-​​lived as youth itself – but we weren’t to know that at the time. Regulatory bodies had ripped up the rulebook, and all over world the strange-​​named pilots of these F1-​​level supercars on knobbly tires were defining the art of driving. At the same time, the faceless suburbs of the country were resounding with the noise of straight through exhausts. Greed was good, the Group B revolution was the embod­iment of power-​​lust and we were greedy for speed. My little collective of revheads was a motley crew of automotive-​​aspiration. Darren had a Mark 1 Escort pumped up and drugged to resemble an RS Mexico. Steve had a lowered Mark 11 Capri with a bored out 3.0 litre lump, a cleaned body in pearl white with an immaculate black vinyl roof. Wayne had bought heavily into the Group B thing (or at least his dad had done) and gone for a light blue Lancia Beta coupé. It was rapid, but a little effem­inate in a Roman sort of way. I meanwhile was working all the hours god sent to save up for a either an RS2000 or an Alfasud (I was always a little bit left-​​field, me). I lived by the side of the A12 and at night in my bed I could hear the grunty tone of my mates and the rest of the local toerags rinsing every last bit of power out of their Dagenham Dustbins between traffic lights. The car park at Oscars, the local disco, (didn’t everyone have an Oscars, and aren’t all of them a Drive Thru McDonalds these days?) was a sea of English Iron and Italian rust buckets. But the heroes we worshipped in those fleeting days weren’t called Colin or Dave or Carlo or Massimo. They had been blessed with the rhythmic, perfectly scanned monikers of their Finnish ancestry. Hannu Mikkola. Ari Vatanen. Juha Kankkunen. They created the art of driving in their own image. We may have had English blood, but ever since the early eighties we have had Finnish souls.

If like me you now have the urge to go Group B, you will need rally car insurance, call Adrian Flux on 0800 089 0050.

Death Race 2000

Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009

In America the automobile was always an icon of liberty. And from the very earliest days of motoring the American road trip itself is a sort of sacred pilgrimage where techno­lo­gical progress and the freedom of the open road were celeb­rated. It wasn’t long until Hollywood hammered the image home and road-​​tripping motors nudged out covered wagons as the carriers of the flame of American self-​​determination. All the more powerful, then, is the Roger Corman produced exploit­ation epic that is Death Race 2000. Set in a dystopian millennium where a fascist global government keeps the plebs in order by the spectacle of sacri­ficial festivals on the coast – to-​​coast highway, the 1975 movie is an absurdist commentary on America’s automotive obsession and a delightful subversion of the sacred coast-​​to-​​coast trip. Featuring perform­ances of the purist vintage of killer kitsch from David Carradine and Sly Stallone, the design and photo­graphy is garishly evocative of the comic book futurism popular in the seventies. The twisted chicks in the cast are jarringly sexy, and some of the dialogue is poetry of the campest order. And of course, there are some brilliantly stupid modded cars. In an awful promotion of national stereo­types the murderous Roman ‘Nero the Hero’ drives a machine based on a Fiat 850 Spider, whilst ‘Matilda the Hun’ rocks a Swastika helmet and a Karmann Ghia modded to resemble a doodlebug flying bomb. Star of the show David Carradine’s mutant green mean machine is under the skin of it all a 1973 Corvette. America rules, of course. Looking at the film in mixed company and with the spectre of political correctness stalking us all, the film is at times an uncom­fortable watch. Best saved, then, for the late night drive-​​in, somewhere in Nebraska in 1976.

The Beauty of Black Alloys.

Monday, February 2nd, 2009

The Bentley GT Speed is the perfect platform for Automotive darkness.

It’s undeniable. Ebony paint jobs with black alloys look cool. It might seem a bit of an affect­ation, and you might be accused of wanting to play the Dark Knight. To roll with black 20s may even summon visions of subtly veiled automotive kinkiness. Context, no doubt, is everything. Try rocking the look on a your average lukewarm hatch, for example – or fail to to keep the wax clean and mean on the Audi Sportwagon and you’re likely to fall in everyone’s estim­ation. But take up the option on your Bentley GT Speed and it adds just the right dash of hooligan chic to your premiership-​​level pose. The inverse can be true. Back in the day the most desirable girls of Metropolitan Essex aspired collect­ively to the white-​​on-​​white Golf GTi Cabriolet along with power shoulders, teased peroxide and a date with George Michael. Does it follow, then, that white cars equate with femin­inity and black with all things masculine?