I'm not the greatest lover of motor shows. They’re all titillation and no consummation. I’ve never really understood their appeal in the same way I don’t get strip clubs. Just looking at cars is the same as looking at an attractive member of the opposite sex; very pleasant, as far as it goes, but you only get about ten per cent of the pleasure that should be had.

And it may be also that motor shows will wither away. The British show was once one of the most important but has effectively died off. Even the mighty Detroit, Tokyo and Frankfurt shows have been clobbered by the recession: non-attendance by a big carmaker at one of those was once unthinkable, but as the recession struck they bailed out in such numbers that last year’s Tokyo show was almost cancelled.

But it’s superfast broadband that might finally kill the motor show. Why would you travel for hours to a grim part of town to traipse around a draughty exhibition hall when you’ll be able to download hi-def, 3D renderings of the latest models which you can configure with your choice of colour and trim, look at without the backs of other people’s heads getting in the way, and then get into (virtually), start up and drive?

But if one show survives, I hope it’s Geneva. For a start it’s five minutes’ walk from the airport, so you can Sleazyjet in from anywhere. Second, it’s small enough that your feet won’t hurt by the end of the day. Third, despite the size, all the major carmakers and lots of insignificant but insane ones are here: nobody bails on Geneva, yet.

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I’ll get to the important cars of this year’s show in a moment, but those tiny, loopy tuning firms alone make Geneva worth the trip. You’ll see stuff you just won’t see elsewhere; really outrageous cars that it would be completely unacceptable to launch anywhere else. Thought the flagrant, aggressive SUV was a thing of the past? Oh no. Maybe it’s because Switzerland is neutral territory and non-EU that Hamann feels safe revealing its Range Rover Sport-based Conqueror II, or its BMW X6-based Tycoon Evo M. Carlsson brought its €429,000, 735bhp, Mercedes SL-based C25, whose environmental impact will be limited only by the fact that just one will be supplied to each of 25 countries. Swiss tuner Mansory has somehow managed to get hold of a Rolls-Royce Ghost already and pimped it with a shocking electric blue and gold paintjob, which looked even more garish alongside its more subtle but otherwise entirely pointless carbon-fibre bodied Mercedes G-wagen.

Ugliest was probably the Malaysian-made, V8-powered Bufori Geneva limo: slogan, ‘A Statement of Pride,’ though ‘a statement of staggering bad taste’ might be more truthful. Who in their right mind buys these things? Is Switzerland so awash with idle cash that these excrescences are needed to soak it up? Even Bentley wasn’t immune, displaying a foul purple-and-cream Continental.

The design houses like Giugiaro have always used Geneva to show their own work, unfettered by the restrictions of a commission from a big carmaker, and these cars are another good reason for coming. Pininfarina’s take on an Alfa spider is bewitching; Bertone’s Pandion, a variation on the same theme, more challenging. But you’ve never seen anything like the Pandion’s rear grille: a mad, asymmetric jumble of spikes, somewhere between a porcupine’s quills and broken glass. This is proper, free-thinking car design; you wonder if a big carmaker would have the balls to put it into production.

There were some great-looking cars from the major makers, though. The show-stopper was unquestionably Porsche’s 918 Spyder. It was a genuine surprise; when the covers are whipped off new cars at motor shows they have almost always been leaked in advance or shown to car magazines so they can put them on their covers in time. But this was a genuine shock: a plug-in hybrid supercar with over 500bhp and a 3.2sec 0-60mph time, yet returning 90mpg and 70g/km of CO2. Those figures are greener than a Prius, and Porsche is not in the habit – unlike some other car firms – of making claims it can’t prove. For once, looking was almost enough; the 918 manages to appear compact, delicate and light but raw and aggressive all at once. It also looked bored on that stand; bored being looked at when it’s built to be driven. And you just know it will be incandescent to drive.

The most significant car of the show is probably Audi’s A1, because it sits at the nexus of a series of interconnected trends. Audi is on a roll, despite the downturn. People want cool small cars again for a bunch of reasons and they want a premium badge. The Mini better watch out. Ford showed its new Focus, more significant than the A1 in terms of numbers, but the looks are a little Korean and you just know it will be more of the same from Ford; great dynamics, great quality, and a car that doesn’t treat the ‘ordinary’ driver like a schmo.

Alfa’s new, Focus-sized Giulietta was much better-looking, but like I said, the looks are only ten per cent of the appeal.
Elsewhere, like every other motor show for the past two years, pretty much every big carmaker had some sort of electric/hybrid/whatever concept on display, but there’s a big difference between just saying your new concept runs on manure and emits only butterflies, and actually putting an appreciably greener car into profitable mass production.

And like every other motor show, Geneva’s halls are crammed with car-anoraks festooned with cameras and laden with brochures, with the garishly-dressed and bouffanted ‘valued clients’ being buttered up by the more exclusive carmakers (so that’s who buys a Bufori…), with teams of Chinese engineers taking digital pictures of obscure parts of the latest models, and with the angular, architectural, intimidatingly beautiful stand-girls.

I’ve never quite understood this either; if a carmaker wants us to look at its new model, why does it distract us with beautiful women wearing very little? And why does the car industry continue to get away with a ‘marketing’ tactic that should have died off at the same time the Miss World contest was taken off TV? Maybe there’s a parallel with motor shows in general; maybe predictions of their demise are premature. A few more will die off, certainly. But if you don’t mind just looking, go to Geneva.

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While the Geneva Salon goes mental for a succession of hybrid concepts in supercar packages, we were delighting in the technical exactitide of this beautiful recreation of the Ferrari 250 GTO in Lego form.

Malaysian theoretical physicist, photojournalist and Lego-kinky craftsman Ming Thein used a combination of custom made bits and pieces and offcuts from Lego production models to create this amazing little model. It has a full working drive train and suspension, as well as an engine compartment that evokes the snarling beauty of the V12 original, but something of its essence, we think you'll agree, actually conjures up some of the achingly gorgeous lines of the car itself.

And it occurred, if all the mainstream manufacturers are falling over themselves to find a way to produce true supercars with green credentials, shouldn't some of them harness the modular, renewable genius of Lego to produce their vehicles? Surely that is a more realistic way of protecting the planet than sticking an electric battery engine in an industrially produced six litre GT?

Ming is happy to produce custom orders of his miniature works of automotive art, so if you'd like to commission an original creation, get in touch.

Watch this space, meanwhile for a roundup of the Geneva Show once the shouting is over.

It occurred to us whilst discussing the finer points of car design recently that if you had do define one thing that appealed to you about a certain sort of car and had to ascribe an adjective to it, that adjective would be 'Phatness'. Despite the term's irritating neo hip-hop connotations, we believe it is indeed the perfect description of cars that are, well, phat.

Break it down for a moment. Phatness is basically an aerodynamically efficient, ground-hugging aspect. Its elements are gaping, ground hoovering mouths formed by air intakes, dark deep eye sockets that house the lighting gear. Look from the back and it might be the flared arches or wide, deep dished rims and diffusers that do the aesthetic job of creating the vaguely menacing look that we are ascribing it to.

However you define it, you know when you see it. Here are some of our favourite examples of automotive amplitude.

Now I know we might be accused of becoming a little obsessed with the rakish lines of the BMW CSL of late, and that we also bang on a little about the relationship between art and the car.

But indulge us on a little bit of Friday morning admiration.

Imagine being able to make a living from a) driving cars quickly, and b) from painting colourful creations, making mobiles and innovative scultpures in all the colours of the pallete. That's one thing that seem to us a healthy aspiration.

When you combine these two things, then something special just may happen.

When French gallerist and racing driver Hervé Poulain commissioned American born avant garde artist Calder to tag up his CSL in 1975, it was a stroke of genius in itself.

Calder's art was all about movement and colour in space - the man was after all in credited with the invention of the now kid-bedroom-standard 'mobile'.

Three strokes of genius. BMW's Poulain's and Calder himself.

That's what we call the art of the motor.

Lamborghini have produced some of the most hardcore cars ever to grace the streets. The overt machismo of the designs aren't to everyone's taste. But you can't help but admire the definition of automotive exotic. Here are a few of our fave Lambos, from concepts to classics.

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The rarified world of academic car design throws up some interesting concepts every now and then. Many are worthy responses to real-life briefs from within the car industry and offer constructive solutions. Others take future scenarios and offer outlandish strategies for practical or aesthetic problems that haven't arisen yet. Other just look evil. Firmly in the latter category is designer Slavche Tanevsky's 'Ankonian' concept for Lamborghini from 2009. This concept was, apparently, named after a breed of bull famous for its black bristly hair – and basically pushed the real-life Reventon design signatures to their ultimate conclusion. The designer had a healthy amount of practical help from the inhouse team at Lamborghini/Audi, so as you can see, the model he produced looks good enough to develop. Give the man a job.

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This is the car that raised new Lamborghini to new levels. Incorporating the sort of technology, like e-gears, cutting edge aerodynamics and lightweight construction crossed with stratospheric power, the Murcielago defined the obsession with extremes in super car aspiration in the noughties. And for all its various manifestations, the original LP 640 in fighter-plane grey and black alloys is the Lamborghini for which we would most willingly sell a kidney.

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Having become a legend with the Miura and Miura S models since their production began in 1966, in the spring of 1971 Ferruccio Lamborghini surprised the world with the new Countach LP 400. Because the demand for the Miura was still high and preparations were still underway for the mass production of the Countach LP 400, the company decided to present the evolution of the Miura, the SV model, with its wider mud guard and greatly revamped 385 HP engine with separate lubricating systems for engine and gearbox. The last Miura SV was delivered on 15th January 1973 to the son of the car manufacturer Ferdinando Innocenti.

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Espada became Lamborghini’s best seller from 1968 to 1978. The 4-seater was designed and built by Carrozzeria Bertone. Depending on the version, the 4-litre 12-cylinder engine developed between 325 and 350 HP. With 1,227 models produced – and from 1974 also available with a Chrysler automatic 3-gear gearbox – the Espada was the backbone of the company in financial terms, for eleven years.

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The Diablo was the ultimate transitional Lambo. It's chunky, brutal design wasn't for everyone, but the aesthetic was moving toward the new look of the Murcielago and the Gallardo that were heralded by Audi's involvement in the brand. In September 1999 Lamborghini presented Diablo GT at the frankfurt show as the world's fastest production cars. To reach the promised 338 km/h the GT had a 6-litre V12 engine, plus a completely revamped body and chassis. Only 83 were ever built. Brutal beauty.

The Race Retro show has been getting better and better over the years, with everything the tweedy obsessive of all things automotive and old could wish for. This year as well as the usual gems from the history of British motorsport, from Mk 1 Cortinas to Formula 1 classics, the show is going a step further into the olden days by featuring an amazing range of truly significant Karts from way back in the day.

Karting is of course the grass roots motorsport par excellence – the great traditions of British racing flow from this oil soaked and fragrant root. So, it makes sense that karts should get their proper moment in the spotlight at a show like this.

Organises tell us that the display on the club’s stand will include a 1959 Keele Mk1/Bultaco, similar to the one raced by Sir Stirling Moss, which was restored for Sir Stirling’s 80th birthday celebrations at Goodwood. Also from 1959, a Progress Kart similar to one raced by Graham Hill in the first official British kart race at Lakenheath, Norfolk. There will also be a 1967 Cobra raced by Bobby Day and Mickey Allen, both former British Kart champions. The Cobra is one of only three built and has an unusual chassis design and steering arrangement taken from Ronnie Peterson’s Robardie kart. The final kart displayed is a 100cc Dale Scorpion. Built in 1963, it was Dale’s first class one kart and features an all-in-one integral seat, floor tray and petrol tank manufactured from fibre glass.

For the fast paced live action demonstration, around thirty karts from the humble 1960 Trokart to the 1970s Barlottis and the 140mph Yamaha 250cc twin powered Zips will be on the circuit, with one of Martin Hines’ Zip Hermites to be amongst the examples from that era.

We can almost smell the two stroke fumes from here.

www.raceretro.com

The holy grail of the hot rod generation was to be able to fabricate beautiful car bodies in steel and other materials. Many of the kids who became Hot Rod building legends had honed their fabrication skills in the hot house of the WW2 American economy. The war ended and charged-up servicemen came home and wanted the buzz of driving fast cars. It was boom time in America and everything seemed possible.

Dean Jeffries was one of this generation of brilliant mechanics and fabricators with an audacious enough vision to dream with his eyes wide open. Having worked extensively with AC Cobra creator Carroll Shelby, he began to build the Mantaray in 1963 in response to a call for submissions to a high prestige competition that had been posted by a promoter called Al Slonaker.

The young Californian fused two old Maserati single seater chassis he had acquired and welded them together. The suspension, brakes, and steering were kept on for the finished article but apart from four Weber carburetors, the car was, he told Street Rodder Magazine recently "true-blue American, right down to the 15-inch magnesium-cast Halibrand wheels and the bred-for-Indianapolis Goodyear Blue Streak Speedway Special tires."

Unsurprisingly, the gorgeously curvacious body Jeffries created (which was, apparently, hand-built from no less than 86 sheets of metal), was enough to win him the 'contest of fame'. This not only won him a prize of $10,000 and a trip to Europe, but also changed the way the world thought about Hot Rods.

This is what we call truly creative car culture. And we love it.

Images via Street Rodder Magazine

The Canadian-American challenge was a spectacular formula. Running from 1966 until the oil crisis of '74 scuppered the fun, there were no limits on engine size, aerodynamics or aspiration.

Along with Group B rally, which came along a decade after its demise, Can-Am was in other words as close as motor sports ever came to Extreme Fighting.

Think of it and images are conjured of brightly coloured spiders, huge power-to weight ratios and the brutal grapplings of man and machine. Can Am also saw the first wave of wind tunnel tested tech that started to turn beautiful racing cars into mutant brutes.

But amongst the no-nonsense, torsional engineering of Can Am came the gorgeous Ferrari 350 – which was  basically a 330 P4 upgraded at Maranello to compete in the series.

Though the low front end of the smoothly-flowing spider body recalls the Lolas and Mclarens that dominated the series, it retained the spectacularly pretty bone structure of the original p4.

Chris Amon, according to sources, scored the car's best result of 1967 at the Laguna Seca debut when he finished fifth. But despite the lack of podium glory, would not have felt honoured to pilot one of these?

The eye candy above came via those fine folks at  RM Auctions May it carry you through the weekend.

Regular Influx devotees will realise that we spend a righteous amount of time scouring the World Wide Web for vintage images that reflect car culture down the ages in order to share their beauty.

It's an addictive, time-consuming pursuit but one we think is worthwhile.

If you're not aware of the past, so goes the saying, you can't make proper plans for the future.

With that dictum in mind we were stoked to find these beautiful shots of Las Vegas that date from, we would guess, around 1958.

Wrought in the cult-provoking and recently discontinued film stock known as Kodachrome, they shine an incredibly intimate light on a bygone era – and illustrate perfectly how the colour and variety of car design from that American boom time has these last 50 years been so influential on popular culture the world over.

Not being experts of chrome-clad Yankee iron, we can only make an educated guess: we think the off-white car in the foreground of the shot above is a '57 Chevy (look closely and dig the glamorous girl in white shades riding in the back).

We would appreciate the feedback from any of you American car experts out there to name the rest of this colourful assemblage.

The shot below, meanwhile features a beautifully framed Ford Thunderbird, offset nicely by the otherworldly architecture of 50s Vegas.

Imagine what shots from these exact perspectives would look like in 2010?

Images via A Continuous Lean.

Italy-based British artist Chris Gilmour has to be one of the most meticulous cardboard engineers in the world.

His renderings of everything from a ’32 Ford Hotrod to the classic Cinquecento – and from a Vespa scooter to the delectable Aston Martin DB5 –make the strength of the original designs all the more powerful.

“The objects call up memories and emotions connected to our experience of these things…” the artist told an interviewer recently, “…many people assume that the works were ‘real’ things that had been painted or covered in paper”.

There is indeed a very strange leap in your mind when you first see Gilmour’s work. The cardboard cars seem to us a poignant homage to design and engineering values that are lost somewhere back in the twentieth century.

The fact that these pieces are made from materials regarded often as useless only adds to their power. They feel almost like a lament for devalued mechanical beauty.

http://www.chrisgilmour.com