Goodbye, Pork Pie: Mini

Cars Culture

remembering a yellow Mini and the horrendously non-PC Kiwi road movie

This is quite possibly the most politically incorrect road movie ever made.

Coming straight out of 1981 New Zealand, what would you expect?

The story goes like this: ne’erdowell Gerry from the North Island hires a yellow mini using a stolen license. The wife of Gerry’s mate John has just left him and moved to Invercargill, which is a one horse town at the very south of the South Island.

John is gutted, has no transport and needs a ride. Together with the little mini that Gerry names “Pork Pie”, they hit the road to travel the length of the country. Their high speed exploits earn them the name “the Blondini gang”. The police, however take a dim view of this and make it their mission in life to stop the Blondini boys from reaching their destination.

A catalogue of jolly japes ensues, which, owing to Kiwi cultural lag, feels like a cross between ‘confessions of a mini-driver’ and ‘Carry On On The Road’ – straight out of the early seventies if you will.

It might have all the trappings of a classic bit of British comedy, but there’s something a bit nasty about it all.

Still, if you’ve used up the youtube clips of classic road movies, this is one to explore that you might not have noticed.

Awful soundtrack, too.